I know I am a fool, trying to make connections out of scraps, but how else is there to proceed? The fragmentariness of life makes coherence suspect but to babble is a different kind of treachery. Perhaps it is a vanity. Am I vain enough to assume you will understand me? No. So I go on puzzling over new joints for words, hoping that this time, one piece will slide smooth against the next.
Walk with me. Hand in hand through the nightmare of narrative, the neat sentences secret-nailed over meaning. Meaning mewed up like an anchorite, its vision in broken pieces behind the wall. And if we pull away the panelling, then what? Without the surface, what hope of contact, of conversation?
Gut Symmetries
p.24
You have the capacity to affect your situation, but not what it might mean.
thursday
1am
i love the idea of words "secret-nailed over meaning". barney and i were talking about all the layers you have to get right to be the perfect artist. it's easy to obsure meaning and emotion with skill, especially if you're nervous. only by overcoming your ego, transcending fear with love, can meaning be set free.
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